Where should my 3 year old be up too?

He would be very unusual if he could read or write. Most 3 year olds cannot. Frankly, I think he sounds like every other kid that age I've met, including my own. My son was very physical like that and was delayed a little in his speech, but it's only because he was too busy running, climbing and jumping on everything to care. All kids are different and some will develop in certain areas faster than others. It's nothing to worry about and almost all kids develop adequately by the time school starts. If you want to start him on letter recognition and phonics, there is a GREAT free phonics site at www.starfall.com. My 3 year old daughter loves it and can even use the mouse independently now. She constantly asks to do her "ABCs".